Christmas Card 2015

Merry Christmas from all of us G's

Please note MDG's smile. And PDG's crazy eyes. And the behind the scenes help of Mama and Papa H - very important given we were quite literally bound and useless during this photo shoot.

Here's hoping you and yours are getting everything you want this year!

Spirit Week

One of the fun things about teaching in a high school is remembering just how big and important those high school rites of passage are.  While I'm finally getting over my enjoyment of high school dramas on TV, I'm still daily reminded of why settings like prom and graduation make for perfect season finales - they are crazy important to 16-year-olds.

While a notch down, so is Homecoming.  Who are you going with?  What will you wear?  Oh, you're not going?  Is it because no one asked you?

WSHS has a really complicated system for the dance.  About three weeks out you get a form that has to be stamped by the school treasurer and librarian saying that you don't owe the school any fines.  Then, after that deadline comes and goes, you have to take that stamped form to the table outside the cafeteria in order to buy tickets.  Oh, what's that, you didn't get your form stamped because you were too cool to plan on going but now you've been asked and you want to buy your ticket???  Too bad.  You missed the deadline.

Intense, right?

I didn't go to the dance this year or last year, but I hope it's at least worth all those hoops.

Well, the part I was willing to participate in was the dressing up.  We had America Monday, 1960s Tuesday, Out of this World Wednesday, Throwback Thursday (or #tbt) and Class Color Friday. Pictures below.

I did skip on 1960s because I figure, people were pregnant in the 60s, right?  Good enough.  And a friend helped us out with Wednesday.  Thursday and Friday were easy.  A 1999 Regional Track t-shirt threw it back and then a combo of a green WSHS tee with a black WSHS sweatshirt with yellow writing covered all but the freshman class's assigned colors.

The kids of course went all out.  Distractingly all out.  Do you know what it's like to teach commands to a classroom filled with painted faces, fairy wings, togas, antennae, wigs etc? Of course, I didn't give much sympathy as I did expect them to learn commands while wearing all that too.  Some did, some didn't.  Oh well.

It was a blast though.  Maybe next year I'll be creative enough, and fit into enough of my wardrobe, to commit to all five days.  Maybe.

In the meantime, I'll at least have a little fun with them, let them soak in the all important competition within the school, then together against PSHS or whomever we play next year, and I'll try to remember how great it felt to strive for and win the Silver Gavel all those years ago at my own JHHS.

Christmas Card 2011

Ok, friends, I disappeared for the holidays because they are crazy.  Suffice it to say that the next week or two will be a good bit of backtracking to share snip-its of Christmas trees, nephews, fancIphones and candy cane umbilical cords.

Thanks to M and her lovely lady friend for making J-Man's and my belly art dreams a reality

The Blueprints

A work in progress

Everybody gets a belly

Finished product!

The innie and the outtie

Yeah, we're doing this

and we're still tough

Love

What have I done?!?!

Are you seeing this?!?!

Yeah, I did that.

We do still wear real clothes

Lots of belated holiday love from the G's. 

And yes, plans are already in the works for next year's card, featuring PDG.  Let the yearlong suspense begin

Babymorphing

I'm not pregnant.  But if I were, look what a cutie the interwebs say J-Man and I could make

Come on Mother Nature, doesn't the world need an adorable Afro-Eskimo named Nicole the G Jr?

Curious about your own future children?  Check out this baby morphing site.  Just beware, even truly beautiful people with carefully selected pictures can still cause the world wide web to think their kid might actually look like this...

Special thanks to friends who enjoy procrastinating on baby websites as much as I do!

Monkeying Around

In need of a Monday midday pick-me-up?  Do a google image search for "monkeys looking confused."

Brightened my rainy day right up!

Weekend Getaway

When I first caught wind this week that J-Man and O-Dog (KB's husband) might be up to something, I gotta admit, I was nervous.

Why, you ask?  Well, let's just say surprises aren't my thing.  I love waiting for surprise packages from Santa, sure, but surprise trips?  Yikes.  And then having to pack for a surprise trip?  Double yikes. 

Step one was the elaborate preface.  J and O thought it would be fun to convince us girls that we were going winter camping.  Except, joke on them, KB flat refused to go on such a trip.  Ha!  Gotcha boys.  We know you respect your wives more than to try and take us to sleep in the frozen snow or ice-fish on a sketchy lake.  When I promised to "try new things" I meant sushi rolls and go-karts - no sleeping bags required. 

So yeah, the camping joke failed, and we were promised it would at least be somewhere nice, but nothing more. Imaginations ran wild.

Bags packed and headed into rush hour traffic we made our way to...

Do you know already?

Are you dying with anticipation?

Should I add more lines or are you like me and have already scrolled down to see?

Ok

ok

It's

Annnnnn - apolis.

That's how west coaster J-Man says it.  I tried to explain, it's like you're going to take a nap.  uh-nap-olis.  We agree to disagree, which happens now and again. Annapolis.

And speaking of naps, I had amazing naps.  The kind of naps that are so calmingly beautiful that you wake up and hope you're blessed with yet another one before the end of the day.  And I was!  Oh, naps, how I worked hard all week to deserve you. How I wish every weekend could be packed with two or three or four naps like these.  What is it about hotel rooms with no to-do lists of chores that just ease you into sweet, sweet slumber?

So the weekend continued and we learned a few important life lessons.

For example, the portion sizes in Annapolis restaurants are, shall we say, microscopic.  Alternatively, the quality of the crab cakes is astronomical. 

Also, J-Man did not actually steal the pretty flowers below from a graveyard.  Phew!

Strangely, hotels do still have phones in the bathroom.  Are you supposed to do business in there?  Like real business, not stinky business?  If so I think it would look like this.

But really folks, how can you not love a town with multi-colored walls?  It made us girls want to do romantic photo shoots. And fact, there is nothing more fun than a silly photo shoot, and nothing more frustrating than boys who won't take it seriously.

So, thanks, guys, for the surprise.  I loved it.

Superbowlin'

Last night we all know that the Packers won.  And in the G-money household, it was glorious.  There were chips, and pita chips, and pretend-to-be-healthy chips, and dips of all shapes and sizes.  There were pulled pork sandwiches that dripped everywhere, carrots that crunched magnificently, and his and hers valentine's cookies.

And when the game started there were cheers and there were curses.  There were pelvic thrusts and jubilation.  There were rape jokes.  (disclaimer: we do not actually think rape is funny. trust me. we do think it's a good joke opportunity when the quarterback who has been accused of sexual assault a time or two is losing and claiming injustice. good luck there, buddy...)

While all this was going on, I was thinking about my list.  You know, my celebrity list.  Everyone has one, right?  Where you and your lover decide what infidelities are acceptable, and limit them to some number like 5 or 10 or however many you can tap in one night.  One of those lists.

I have a list.  Except, I don't keep track of it very well. I add and subtract members on a whim.  These days it's something like this:

1. Morgan Freeman (ok, not really.  that's our favorite joke.  except maybe.  if he asked me nicely.  or if he stood on a table and told me he was the HNIC!)

So, Morgan Freeman
2. Don Cheadle
3 -? Any of the non-domestic-abusing men in Takers
and my token athlete - A-Rodg.

Yes, Aaron Rodgers has been the QB on J-Man's fantasy football team for two years now and his unshaken, boy-next-door smile keeps me cheering through 12 hours of RedZone Sundays week after week after week.  I imagine him walking to class, sliding in late next to his lab partner in college.  Playing Madden with his buddies in a dingy dorm room.  Just, you know, being a guy.  But a good guy.  Maybe holding the door for the girl behind him. Hi-fiving the screaming cheese-head fans.  Calling his mom on a Sunday that isn't Mother's Day - just because.  Holding my hand as I deliver his baby.

Wait.  Whoops!  Where's that delete key when you need it?!

Although, see, that's actually part of our clause.  With the others, J-Man and I have never discussed consequences.  It's a one-time-only sort of a deal.  But with A-Rodg, unprompted, he has given me his blessing to carry this allstar's baby.  (assuming I'll ever get to carry anyone's baby).  He says it would be worth it.  And everyone likes a mixed baby - look at how ridiculously cute my nephews are.  Painfully cute.  And imagine the money we could make.  And I bet A-Rodg would come visit once every couple years to toss the football with his kid and autograph my stretchmarks.  What a fabulous life we could have, me and J-Man and baby A-Rodg-G.

See, these are the things I was thinking.  Totally non-football things.  Completely, utterly, ridiculous scenarios that aren't tied to any actual information I've ever researched about him, his team, his mom, or his opponents.

Just me and my goofy imagination keeping me entertained between commercials. 

Speaking of which, jury is still out on which commercial was the best.  Probably the girl getting slammed with a pepsi to the head.  I told you it's funny when people fall.  No?