Dear Third Trimester Insomnia

Dear Third Trimester Insomnia,

"How wonderful you are...."

Said no pregnant woman.  Ever.

I get it, I get it, you want to help me prepare for the midnight feedings and screaming fits coming next month.  You think I might've forgotten how to exist on two hour chunks of sleep with only incomplete REM cycles.  You think I've gotten too spoiled with just twice nightly pee breaks that I can block out almost like sleepwalking.

Well, you're wrong.

I do remember.  It hasn't been that long.

And sure, I'm spoiled that PDG was sleeping through the night somewhere around 7 months (I think?), but it's not like you can just forget those first months.  Not that fast.

So, if you and your buddy Late Night Leg Cramps would go hide in a corner somewhere, this increasingly exhausted mama would be elated. I need to save 3am Netflix-watching for maternity leave please.

Ok.

Thanks